Abang Gongchan .. I’m devastated. Memories can’t stop hunting me ;(

So, the memories keep on hunting me. The guilty feeling conquer. Damn -.-

Why must I feel this way? I mean, I am still a kid. I shouldn't think much about loves, drama and stuff. I am not maturd at all to have the so-novel-things~ Haha. I felt guilty. Very guilty. I am bad. Urgh~ If I tell Nad what did I actually feel, I know what will she say. I know~ So I am not going to tell anyone. I will just shut my mouth up, stay calm. Let things flow naturally. Just follow the flow. It wouldn't be that hurt right? Hasty decision and talk will make things worse.So, better left the things unsaid. I wish life will be easier after this. InsyaAllah. No more 'too much thinking' after this. NO MORE.

Oh why must the flashbacks exist? Why? Its hurt. I can move on but the flashback will always there.

You are back, you screw up everything. You shouldn't left at the first place. But, you did. Have you ever think, how will your decision to leave me will hurt me? Everything changed now. Things will never be the same again, Syaa. Life must go on. Stop looking backward, you will never have the same old times. Once life changed, it will never be the same. Appreciate your present, plan your future and life will be better. Stop hoping... The higher you put the hopes, the greater the pain you will feel. Stop caring too much, trust too much. Just stop the too much. Your too much will hurt you. I swear it will. I have felt it, so many times. Appreciate what you have now, before its gone.

Stop make me fall for you, again. I just can't endure the pain anymore. You have no idea how hurt it will be to fall back in your arms.